Curve Balls: You don't see 'em 'till you do

It's amazing what you realize, what you learn when things are so polarized. Unfamiliar experiences have so much to offer, they shock you into a new view on life. Just a couple weeks ago, okay maybe not weeks, a month or so ago, my grandmother that lives with us had a stroke. It was a different experience, especially seeing it happen right in front of me. It made me think of what she used to say so often: "I've been short of breath lately, my doctor says that it could be a problem with my heart but i don't see how that could be, I've never had heart problems before."

It seems so silly for her to maintain that outlook on life because of course the first time you have a problem it is just that, the first time. We don't usually have a warning of things to come, we aren't told, "Hey by the way, tomorrow at 6:32 pm there's going to be a new trial coming your way, something life changing and very difficult, here's you fair warning." Though nice, it isn't feasible nor does it quite jive with the eternal necessity of the Plan.

Lately I've given some serious thought to the to this idea. Last Monday something happened to me that i perceive to be genuinely life changing. It was certainly a curve ball, something i certainly never would have seen coming and if you had asked me a week ago, i would have said that i would hate for it to happen. (Again an interesting point, another reason the Lord can't tell us when he's about to do something) As it is now, though it has been painful it would seem that it will continue to be painful, i am extremely grateful for the happening.

Sometimes it just bazaar how things can change so fast, change without warning, and in ways that you yourself wouldn't have picked or even thought wise. This is the strangest feeling i have ever felt, and not a pleasant one, yet...i wouldn't trade it away, i wouldn't wish it away.

Well now, i'm just rambling but maybe in the future i can be more straight forward about all of this but i guess for now this will have to do.